By Anna

While staying at my grandparents’ house last weekend I overheard their 6:30 a.m. conversation concerning names of grandchildren’s’ significant others.cvbridaldreamweb

Poppo: What’s the name of the young man downstairs?

Grandma: Alex.

P: I thought it was Joel.

G: That’s Holly’s boy.

P: I know, I thought there were two Joels. We don’t need to remember these names until we know they’re going to stick around.

G: And even then who knows how long they’ll be around.

Being just as capable of divorce as the next wedded person (though A, I’m not married and B, statistically I am not as likely to divorce because my parents are not divorced), I am still not an advocate for divorce as an option. We laugh about the guy who has had five wives (Grandpa Charles on my dad’s side) and laugh at films where divorce is a theme, but the excruciating emotional pulls divorce brings is no laughing matter.

In Hungary people joke about being good at burying the dead (because they’ve lost so many wars), well in America we can joke about being good at keeping divorce attorneys employed (because we love to divorce!)

Unsurprisingly, White Americans are more likely to be for divorce in an unhappy marriage than Black Americans. Statistically, White people have more money to afford the expense of divorce. Though when we talk about divorce in statistics race is always a factor, it is not my main focus for today.

I’m talking about marriage and divorce because I will be attending yet another wedding this weekend (though I doubt it will end in divorce). And I have at least two, if not scores more, weddings to attend next summer as I am in peak wedding stage of life (21 to about age 30).

Here’s what I know about divorce based on The Pew Research Center’s research:

  • Divorce is highest among White and Black Americans.
  • Divorce is highest among 50-64 year olds.
  • Divorce is highest in the $30K/year income bracket.
  • Divorce is highest among non-college graduates.

Since divorce rates have doubled in America since 1960, I suppose my grandparents should be a bit concerned about learning names (even if that’s a bit cold) and us young folk should not be so eager for marriage, after all one has their whole life for the opportunity.

Though divorce disheartens me and is a very real fact for Americans, it is not divorce that I want to talk about, but I want to know why Americans (and Christians) tie marriage to success. Why do most Americans who are not married want to be married? Why is there not just as much gratitude and appreciation for single people? Why are single people older than the age of 30 pitied for their singleness? It seems to me that we put too much emphasis on marriage and end up with a lot of irresponsible people playing house.

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